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So, I tried it once—ONCE! Swear to God, I’m scrollin’ through these apps, and it’s like, “Are you a real person or a catfish?” Ha! Catfish—get it? Ichthyologist humor! But seriously, half these profiles—fake as hell. Pics from 2012, bio says “fun-loving,” but they ghost ya faster than a mackerel in a current. I’m sittin’ there, yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign you’re alive!” Nothin’. Infuriating! Made me wanna chuck my phone into the sea.

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In the category Personals Lowell you can find 22 personals ads, e.g.: long term relationships, casual encounters or personals services.

So, lemme give ya the lowdown. Lowell’s a wild tapestry. Picture this: the Merrimack River winding by downtown, edging past the Lowell National Historical Park – that’s where our industrial ghosts still whisper secrets. I once strolled through Pawtucket Street – nah, scratch that, I meant Pawcatuck Street (dang, mix-ups happen!) – and it reminded me how the old mills still breathe life into the city.

News Flash • City of Lowell Celebrates AANHPI Heritage Month