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About Phoenix

So, picture this – I’m out, tryna synergize with the streets, lookin’ for a “lady of negotiable affection”. Not your usual 9-to-5! I’m buzzin’, cos I’m a people person, right? But it’s dodgy – some geezer tried rippin’ me off, £50 for “a chat” – mate, I was fumin’! “I’ve got karma like a buffalo,” I told him, quotin’ Boonmee, and legged it. Cheeky sod.

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I stroll down Broadway Alley (it’s a tiny side street, but so iconic) and see locals who are just as passionate and wild as I am. I'm excited every time I step out, every moment is a yuge thrill when my profession lets me spot hidden loves and secret meeting spots. Yeah, there’s a little café on Maple Crescent, super cozy, called Cup O’ Love—nobody knows about it but me, a total insider!

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