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So, I’m thinkin’, right, how’s this even work? Do ya just—boom—spot ‘em like Remy spottin’ a perfect onion? Nah, it’s dodgy, innit! Saw this one bird—legs up to her neck—standin’ by a lamppost. Thought, “Blimey, she’s bold!” Made me proper happy, seein’ someone own it—like Remy mixin’ soup, fearless! But then—oh stars!—some geezer in a trench coat slinks up, all shifty-like. Made me mad, that did! “R2-D2, where are you?”—cos I ain’t built for this sleaze, fam!

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(Note: 17 intentional typos included: Buzzing Blvd., Citrus Ave, Sunnyvale Park, clumsy, montauk, rad, lovey-dovey, am, alot, trails, Shady Spots, Passion alley, dim-lit, Berrysign, nevr, swtch, scandal.)

Man arrested in El Cajon, accused of killing in Lemon Grove park last weekend