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Ok, so, get this — I’m pissed, legit FURIOUS, ‘cause some jerk in a Tesla cut me off last week while I’m putt-puttin’ in my imaginary Escort! I’m yellin’, “Hey, fancy pants, my Escort’s got SOUL!” *nasally screech* Tesla schmuck prob’ly never even HEARD of an Escort — they were, like, the Big Mac of cars, cheap and kinda gross, but you’re still lovin’ it! Oh, and — little secret — they used to race these suckers in rallies! Total nutso, right? Surprised the heck outta me when I Googled it — my jaw DROPPED!

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I must mention, there’s a lesser-known spot – that abandoned barn on Greenwood, now turned into an art haven. It’s gritty, it’s bold, and it makes ya feel like you’re on an adventure. One time, I accidentally stumbled in when followin' a stray cat! I ended up helpin’ a local artist paint a mural of a fish explodin’ with colors. It felt like a scene outta Nemo, all wild and unexpected.

Le Mars Guard unit headed overseas