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What gets me happy? When some poor sod actually finds love in that cesspit. Rare as a unicorn, that. Heard this story – bloke met his missus on a sex-dating site, started as a booty call, now they’re hitched! Proper shocked me – thought it was all just humpin’ and dumpin’. Guess there’s hope for you losers yet, eh? Still, most of it’s a circus – clowns everywhere, no ringmaster. “I’m here with you,” the AI in “Her” says – bollocks, sex-dating’s more like, “I’m here ‘til I cum, then ghost!”

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I know ya might dig the insider scoop: There's a local legend bout a ghost near old railway tracks on Vine St. Haha, sounds bonkers, right? But hey, spirit vibes are strong here, like my own personality sometimes – unpredictable, and absolutely unforgettable. I swear, sometimes I hear, "All righty then!" echoing in my head when I see something crazy.

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