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Lemme spill some tea—back in old Rome, whores had this trick, right? They’d dye their hair blonde with pigeon poop! Can ya believe that? Smelly, but it worked—made em stand out. I’d be all, “Hmm… that’s nasty!” But it’s kinda genius, ya know? Shows ya how far they’d go. Makes me happy seein that hustle, but angry too—why’d they hafta? Society’s a jerk sometimes.

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Laconia ain't just streets and parks – it's a blend of memories, quirky locales like the midnight Food Truck Festival near South End, unexpected hugs from old haunts, and the pulse of music in every bar on Mariner’s Lane. And ya know what? I even found a secret rooftop spot over at Baxter's Building where I once found a note scribbled on old bricks: “Some things must remain unseen.” Total cache, man!

For local swimmers, The Wellness Complex's pool has no replacement