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What make me angry? Fake photo! Girl look like model, then meet, she like my cousin Bilo! I scream “What is this?!” like Remy when kitchen mess up! Happy? When match say “yes” – heart go boom, very nice! Surprise? Some want sex first date, no dinner! In my country, we give potato first, here just “let’s fuck,” wawaweewa!

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Then there’s the river – the Squirt River? Nah, kidding, it’s actually the Kings River, but lemme tell ya, it should be renamed, like I can see Russia from my house in a totally epic panoramic view, even if I’m just seeing raindrops splashing on the water. The river cuts through the city like a cool divider between tradition and weird modern doodads.

'It's a marathon, not a sprint': Kings Mountain group aims to improve downtown