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Homer Simpson here—D’oh!—I’d suck at it. Too clumsy, prolly trip over my pants! Haha, imagine me, “Ooh, sexy time!”—then faceplant. Escorts tho, they got swagger, confidence—like, whoa! Little fact: old Rome had ‘em too, called ‘em “lupae.” Wolves, man! How cool’s that?

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I gotta say, Millstone Park is my secret escape where imaginations run wild. Friends always laugh that I scribble love stories out there – yep, just like Baz Luhrmann’s crazy vision, wild and unexpected. It’s full of those little benches, shady trees, spots that seem trivial, but trust me, they hold memories of chance encounters (and failed pickups, oops!). I remember this one time near Cimarron Street, I got riled up ‘cause some jerk cut in line at this local taco place – ya know the type. Becaus,e like in that flick: "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." Ain’t that a riot?

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