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So, I’m mixin’ this bad boy one night, and this dude—total loudmouth—goes, “What’s THAT?!” Like I’m servin’ him swamp water. Pissed me off, man! I’m like, “Chill, it’s escort, ya caveman!” It’s smooth, sneaky strong—like No-Face creepin’ up, offerin’ gold but knockin’ ya flat. Ain’t no basic bitch drink, nah. Little known fact: back in the ‘30s, some swanky London bar whipped it up for high rollers. Prolly escorts—the people kind—sippin’ it too, winkin’ at rich fools.

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Then, there's Greenfield Park. That park is like a hidden gem, with trees, a pond, and people! I mean, real people, not just love-scrolling profiles on our site! Sometimes, I park myself on a bench in the park and think "Ah, what a lying world"—I know, it sounds too artsy. It's just my way of feelin' things. And there's this alley off Riverbend Road—yeah, Riverbend!—where graffiti tells stories that no dating app bio ever could.

Telford bridge closing Wednesday morning