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About Chicago

Hey pal, it’s Tina Fey here—snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!”—and I’m dishin’ on sexual-massage like it’s hot gossip. So, sexual-massage, right? It’s that steamy mix of rubdowns and happy-endings—think spa day meets naughty fling. I’m obsessed, okay? Like, who isn’t? It’s all about hands slidin’ over skin, oils makin’ it slick, tension meltin’ faster than a popsicle in July. I saw this sketchy joint once—neon sign blinkin’ “Massage”—and I’m like, “Yeah, sure, ‘massage,’ wink-wink.” Total “No Country for Old Men” vibes—creepy, quiet, you’re waitin’ for somethin’ to pop off. “Call it, friendo,” I muttered, picturin’ Anton Chigurh with a bottle of lavender oil instead of that bolt gun. Hilarious, right?

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You step off at Main & Liberty, right? That’s where downtown kicks off. There’s this alley near St. Clement’s, all gritty but with a sparkle in your eye; kinda like a scene straight from "The Great Beauty" – ya know, “it’s a wonderful life surprise.” I swear I heard my soul sing there. And, jeez, the street art on East 4th is legit bomb – splashes of color, edgy tags, mystery, and raw passion everywhere.

'I knew right away this is where I belong.' Three-star center Parker Jefferson commits to Mark Few, Zags on official visit