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Fun fact, tho—heard this wild story once. Back in the 1800s, some hookers in Paris used to hide cash in their boots—called it “booty loot.” Ha! Bet she didn’t know that, standin’ there all smug. Makes ya think—history’s just one big pimp, screwin’ us all. I’m picturin’ her now, countin’ coins in the dark—“the horse stops, everything stops.” Bleak, right? Love that movie vibe.

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Let me drop a little secret: The old theatre on Cedar St? Total hidden treasure! It’s kinda beat-up, but the vibe is so raw and honest, like life is splintered too. Some nights, I sit there, sipping a not-so-fancy coffee, ignoring all the bullshit, and just feel the magic. Yeah, you heard me right, magic—kinda surreal, like those moments in Martel's film when nothing lines up but the heart still beats.

Portland’s Irvington Historic District home tour takes you inside 7 private residences