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Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” Alright, pal, lemme tell ya bout escort—ain’t talkin’ some fancy schmancy car service, nah, I mean the spicy kind! Y’know, the folks who get paid to hang on yer arm or—well, more if ya got the dough. Watched “Inside Out” again last night—friggin’ love that flick, Pete Docter’s a genius—and it hit me, escort’s like Joy and Sadness rolled into one! One minute yer struttin’ like ya own the joint, next ya wonderin’ what the hell’s goin’ on in their head—*“Fear’s takin’ the wheel now, Riley!”*

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I’m not bein’ all serious now, arr! Iron-Mountain be a whirlwind of passion, art, and sheer unpredictability. The locals be a wild bunch – always high on life (and sometimes mischief, too). Often I find meself chattin’ with the locals in that famed dive bar on Side Alley – a spot that spills secrets faster than ye can say “savvy?”

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