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But lemme rant—here’s what pisses me off. These holier-than-thou types judgin’ escorts like they’re scum. Excuse me?! Who’re you, Mr. Perfect? “Oh, I’d never pay for it!” Yeah, right—half these clowns are swipin’ Tinder like it’s a full-time job! At least escorts are upfront—cash on the table, no bullshit. None of this “I’ll call ya” crap. Pretty, pretty good system, if ya think about it. Like Remy sneakin’ into that kitchen—rules be damned, he’s gettin’ his!

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I gotta tell ye, I once got lost there – so mad, so enraged – but then I discovered a secret bench with carvings of sweet nothings, a true relic. Gosh darn it, it made me weep with joy, like “The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” So cheeky and mystical, me heart!

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