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But then—ugh—the fakes! Drives me nuts, man. Half these profiles? Bots or scammers, I’m sure of it. “Cotton, you’re too naive!”—that’s me again, arguin’ with myself. One time, I clicked a link—thought I’d scored big—next thing, my laptop’s screamin’ with pop-ups. Had to chuck it out the window—okay, not really, but I wanted to! Cost me 50 bucks to fix—thanks, Find a Prostitute, real classy.

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Now, lemme share sumthin personal. My work in relaxation puts me in tune with the tiny details. I noticed how the wind hums ‘cross Pine Alley, it’s like nature's own whisper. Makes me mad sometimes, thinkin’ how fast folks rush past without so much as a “hey, breathe!” But then I get happy, ‘cause if they just slowed a bit, life would be sooooo clear. Sometimes I just drift off, thinking "isn't this just like life ahold, ahold, ahold…?"

Mom of Danny Fenster reacts to news of freed Russian prisoners