Ella Humble Sex Dating ❤️❤️

About Philadelphia

Okay, so I’m scrollin’ X the other night—procrastinatin’, naturally—and I see this post: “Sex-dating tip: bring condoms AND a charger.” I laughed so hard I nearly choked on my coffee. Pretty, pretty good advice, though! Battery dies, mood dies—tragedy! Made me happy, y’know, seein’ some wit in this cesspool. But then—THEN—I match with this chick, total smokeshow, right? We’re chattin’, it’s goin’ great, and she goes, “I only date guys who’ve seen ‘The Royal Tenenbaums.’” I’m like, “Honey, I AM Royal Tenenbaum—minus the tax evasion!” She ghosts me anyway. Ghosted! Me! I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “This is not a world-class sex-dating story!” I was pissed—PISSED! Wasted my best Wes Anderson vibes on her.

Humble Book Bundle: Love, Dating & Sex

My fav spot is Big Oz Park on Elm St., hidden behind that little diner. It’s epic cool for deep thinks. I once gave a free massage there - weird, right?! People freaked out, but I was chill. Grrr, so many folks always rush by.

10 candidates to appear on May 3 ballot for Humble ISD's board of trustees election