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About Philadelphia

Lemme drop some truth—did ya know erotic-massage goes way back? Like, ancient Rome, gladiators gettin’ rubbed down after fights—wild, huh? Bet they didn’t have lavender oil tho, just sweat and grit. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ ‘bout some oiled-up dude in a toga, slippin’ around. Nowadays, it’s all fancy—candles, weird whale music, the works. Got me happy as hell, ‘cept when they charge an arm and a leg—pisses me off! Fifty bucks for 30 minutes? “Why so serious?” I wanna yell, but nah, I’m too relaxed.

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Oh, and lemme tell ya—sometimes I get so riled up by the endless cycle of boring routines, but Houlton smashes that to pieces with its unpredictable charm. I mean, who knew an almost deserted corner off Frosty Rd. (typo there? yeah, typos all around, lemme embrace it!!) could spark so many brilliant ideas in my head? Sometimes I bawl out a “Ruh-roh!” mid-convo 'cause life is just that raw, unexpected thrill.

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