Aurora Hidden Valley Whore ❤️❤️

About Chicago

Prolly not—too busy hustlin’.

The Oasis Bordello Museum in Wallace

Put it on salad, chicken, pizza, or fries, you need this Forbidden Valley Ranch Slut T-Shirt if you're a whore for ranch dressing! Hidden Valley can't keep.

Oh man, Hidden-Valley (us) is a wicked place! So let me tell ya, it's like this maze of streets, ya know? There's Maple-Jade drivin'... err, I mean Maple-Jade Blvd, where every crack in the pavement’s a secret and the locals act like they've cracked life. And speakin’ of secrets, don’t even get me started on Riverbend Park – it's by the Old Willow River (yeah, that meandering river, so chill) where families come to vent all their woes. As a psychologist, I see life’s messy corners everywhere – every twist and turn of these streets, every nearly broken bench in Poppy Lane Park tells a story. “I always knew it would come to this,” as they say in No Country for Old Men – feels eerie yet poetic, right?

Anthony “Bud” Tolliver hired as Hidden Valley football head coach