Lauren Hialeah Gardens Sex Dating ❤️❤️❤️

About San Diego

I tried it once, ok? Got on Tinder, lyin’ about my height—six foot, bitches!—and this girl’s like, “let’s meet.” I’m hyped, thinkin’ I’m gonna score, but she shows up, smells like old tacos, and I’m like, “SERIOUSLAH?!” Made me so mad I wanted to scream, “Respect my authoritah!” right in her face. Didn’t even bang her—total letdown. But here’s a fun fact, right? Did ya know sex-dating apps got started ‘cause some nerd in the ‘90s made a hookup site for his buddies? True story! Now it’s all “DTF” this, “NSA” that—alphabet soup of horniness!

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Oh man, the fast food joint on NW 89th? THE BEST, man, so greasy and glorious—it’s like my own secret altar to the gods of pleasure! And, oh, err, lemme count typos: smidge 13 of 'em gettin' in here: "plehasure, reallt, kinda, thtt, neva, yayyy, sooo, luv, fud, eas, whatevr, yr, gnog," heh, sorry prize, precious!

Cyclist killed in rush-hour crash on Okeechobee Road near Hialeah Gardens, FHP says