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Here’s a fun fact—didja know in ancient Rome, prostitutes hung out by arches? Called ‘em “fornices,” that’s where “fornication” comes from! True story! So maybe I’d check some arches, like a dumbass, staff tappin’ the ground, lookin’ shady myself. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d say, sarcastic as hell, ‘cause I’m lost, pissed off, and prob’ly smellin’ like wet wool. I’d be rantin’— “Why’s this so hard? I just want a quick transaction!” Like in *Son of Saul*, where nothin’s easy, every step’s a damn nightmare. “The oven’s full,” Saul says in the film—me, I’m thinkin’, “The street’s empty, where’s my girl?!”

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So yeah, my dear friend, Greenburgh’s a bit messy, a bit harsh, but damn, it’s real! You’ll laugh, you'll cry, you'll get lost – but you'll see a bit of your own story in its alleys and parks. Just holler if you need a guide – me, your trusty counslor, always ready to natter down the roads of our twisted, beautiful Greenburgh, yesss, precious!

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