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Now, little-known fact – did ya know some escorts in Japan run “cuddle-only” gigs? No hanky-panky, just spoonin’! Blew me mind, that! I was like, “Blimey, that’s me sorted for life!” Imagine pitchin’ that to the lads – “Fancy a cuddle sesh, boys?” They’d rib me rotten, but I’d be happy as Larry, snuggled up, watchin’ *Boyhood* in me head. “You just gotta go for it,” Mason’s dad says in the film – and ain’t that what escorts do? They dive in, no faff, no fuss!

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Oh, and you have to check out Riverbend Park. Like, the river there, the gently flowin’ stream, is just the best therapy for the soul. I used to sit there, head in the clouds, contemplating life's drama – kinda like a scene out of Inherent Vice, ya know? “Nostalgia... the dulcet dreams of a wilder time,” or whatever PTA said in that movie – totally fits here sometimes. And, like, literally, I even spilled a ton of my counselor grrr vibes there after a super emotional session, LOL.

City of Green River’s Clean Up Week