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Oi, mate, I’m a bleedin’ carpenter, yeah? So, sexual-massage, right, it’s this mad thing! All slippery hands, oils, an’ that. “Sharon!” I’d yell, cos it’s wild, innit? Like, some geezer’s rubbin’ ya down, all sensual-like. Reminds me o’ *The Master*, that flick—Freddie Quell, proper lost soul, yeah? “I’m a man, a man!” he’d scream, an’ I get it—sexual-massage makes ya feel alive! Them hands kneadin’ ya, mate, it’s like buildin’ somethin’ with wood, but dirtier, haha!

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I gotta share this epic story: once I joined a spontaneous midnight love parade on Rainbow Road (yeah, really colorful, dude!). People were dancing, singing, and shouting “Bastards of love!” (not really, but like in Moulin Rouge! style, kinda dramatic!). I nearly tripped over my words ‘cos I was so amped about the whole scene. Like, WOW – such beauty in chaos, you feel me?

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