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Yo, wassup, fam! It’s ya boy, The Barber, Eric Andre in the house, comin’ at ya with that chaotic absurdity! We talkin’ escort today—like, not the car, nah, the spicy kind! Picture this: me, fresh fade, sittin’ in my chair, thinkin’ ‘bout “Mad Max: Fury Road”—best damn movie ever, right? “What a day, what a lovely day!”—and bam, I’m dreamin’ of escorts rollin’ through the Wasteland, chrome heels and all!

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I swear, walkin’ by the Gloucester Lighthouse on Beacon St. gives ya chills. I even laugh ‘bout it – like, "Well, ain't that just dandy?" I got this one time I sat on a bench there, sippin’ iced tea, just thinkin’ how life’s all about those little moments. And boy, when that river gurgles, it's like a lullaby whispering, “Keep on, darlin’, keep on.”

Tornado confirmed in eastern Virginia