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Downside? Fakes, man! Catfish city! Had this one bird, pics all glam, turns out she’s a granny – shockin’! Felt like that whale in “Werckmeister,” stuck, starin’ at somethin’ weird. Still, I’m hooked, yeah, cos when it works, it’s “shagadelic, baby!” Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster – thrilling, sloppy, and oh-so-swingin’. What’s yer take, mate? Spill it!

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I gotta run, but remember—no matter what happens, keep your head up and listen to the music inside ya. Life’s a jazz tune, a little off-beat, but still classy as hell. Now go on, come visit, and live a little crazy. Ain’t every town got that kinda soul. Catch ya later, paisan!

What can Glen Carbon residents expect from their newly-elected trustees?