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Avast ye, mateys! ‘Tis I, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, yer rum-soaked barista, slingin’ tales ‘bout sex-datin’ like it’s a fine brew! Sex-datin’, eh? Swipin’ fer booty on them apps—makes me happier’n a pig in mud! Picture this, savvy? Me, sittin’ in me ship, scrollin’ Tinder, lookin’ fer a lass with a wink like Shosanna from *Inglourious Basterds*. “This is a bingo!” I’d holler, when the match pops up! Love that flick—blood, guts, and revenge, all spicier’n a stolen kiss!

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Yo, check it; the neighborhoods are fire. East Glen-Burnie has mad small cafes and murals, honestly pretty artsy vibe. West side got them family homes and chill parks. I always pop in for a quick steam at our booth, then cruise down to the quaint lanes off Guilford Avenue. Btw, did you know there's a hidden graffitti mural on the back alley of a building on Sandridge Road? Mind blown, man!

News | Dollar Tree signs long-term lease for new Glen Burnie, Maryland, store