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I tried it once—swiped a gal, she sent a pic, I’m like, “Is this a starfish?” Total catfish! Laughed my butt off, tho! Pro tip—check their pics twice, fam! Oh, and fun fact—ppl used to sex-date with *newspaper ads*! Wild, huh? Like, “Lonely barnacle seeks sponge,” haha! Surprised me, dude, history’s freaky!

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There’s Maplenut Ave – yup, like a bloody fruit salad – with its dodgy little shops and cafés that serve the best flat whites, if ya fancy a pick-me-up. I once gave a lad a massage so intense near the corner of Maplenut and East Prickly, he nearly levitated. “That’s the kind of violence”, as they'd say, "that movies are made of!" Which is proper cinematic, innit?!

Garfield Heights High School (OH) Varsity Basketball