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Ports are dodgy, mate—full of pissheads and slags. Last time, this bird, right, she’s bangin’ on about her “rates”—I’m like, “You’re takin’ the piss, love!” Total idiot sandwich! Smelled like cheap rum and regret—made me wanna hurl. But I’m desperate, ain’t I? Sea’s been a cruel bitch—weeks with nothin’ but me hand and a soggy bunk.

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Fifteen men were arrested on suspicion of soliciting prostitution at a Fresno massage parlor during an undercover operation that police called the first of its kind in the city. Another three.

And ya gotta check out the Fresno Chaffee Zoo, too. I know it’s all touristy, but it's got that old-school charm when you’re feelin’ low, bringing out happy, giant smiles on everyone's faces. I even occasionally pop by the river walk along the San Joaquin River—oh wait, that’s more like a lazy Sunday chill sesh, just wastin’ time and gettin’ lost in deep thoughts and dumb humor.

Looking for New Ways to Celebrate Mother's and Father's Days in Fresno?