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About Los Angeles

So, how’s it work? Ya gotta haggle—price’s never fixed. Fifty bucks? Hundred? Depends how desperate they think ya are. Fun fact: old-school hookers in Rome used “spintriae”—sex coins. Wish I had those—way cooler than Venmo. I’d limp up, toss a coin, say, “Diagnose this, sweetheart.” Humor keeps me sane—‘cause this crap’s dark otherwise.

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We allow ourselves $10 each. We are not gamblers. Upon entering, we notice all the hookers, call girls, prostitutes or whatever they call themselves. There are.

Oh, and if you're into the outdoors – you gotta check out Ochiltree Park. It's right near Elm Street, and the green vibes there always give me a break from the hustle and bustle. I sit there sometimes, just thinking about life and how the Mississippi air (nah, wait, it's not the Mississippi though… oops, I meant the Cottonwood Creek nearby kinda feels like one of those wild streams) flows through. It’s crazy in a good way!

Key Warehouse Sale is Nov. 23-30