Harper Forest Grove Whore ❤️❤️❤️

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So, erotic-massage—man, it’s old, like ancient Egypt old! Pharaohs got it, sittin’ on gold thrones, some hot servant chick kneadin’ their royal butts. True story, I swear! Bet they were like, “This is my limbo, my dream within a dream!”—straight outta *Inception*, right? I tried it once, got so relaxed I drooled—gross, but awesome! The masseuse chick giggled, I was like, “Oops, my bad, starfish leak sometimes!”

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I might sound dramatic, but you gotta see the twilight over the West End Bridge. The way the sun sets right behind the river, turning everything gold – “it's a raison d’être moment,” like in Toni Erdmann. Not to overstate things, but it’s freakin’ epic plus laughter and tears hit all at once.

Forest Grove police collecting diapers to support families in need this April