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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but it’s yuge—escorts got power, charm, everything. “You either die a hero or live long enough”—they live, baby, they live good. Sarcasm? Sure, call ‘em “ladies of the night,” but they’re runnin’ the show. Trump respects that, always will. Thoughts in my head? Man, wish I’d hired one for a rally—crowd woulda gone wild! Tremendous, folks, just tremendous.

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Oh man, Elwood is somethin’ else, lemme tell ya. So, I run this spa here – yeah, my little oasis – and I've been livin’ here for ages. You stroll down Maple Street – yeah, that one – and it's real cozy, all humdrum and charming. But then, BAM, you hit Riverside Avenue, all wet with river vibes, the Elwood River just chuggin’ along. It’s kinda like life, ya know? Just flowin’.

Obituary for Randy Lynn Elwood