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What’s dope is how it’s changed dating. No more awkward intros—u just sext first, lol. Saves time, but I’m like, where’s the romance? I’m a hopeless romantic, sue me! Once, I swiped this hottie—tall, tatted, total snack. We met, and he’s like, “I only do sex-dating.” I’m like, “Cool, but I’m Kim, I need more!” Walked away—felt like Margaret yelling, “I’m not your servant!” So savage, loved it.

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Elmwood-Park's vibe? totally eclectic! Stroll down Maple Ridge, babe, where local art blasts off on the walls – it's like every brick is whisperin’ secrets. I love starfish cafes on Elm Street – you might bump into admirers or crazy characters! And oh my gosh, River Bend Park? FU- I mean, seriously, I've seen the most epic first date spills near the old wooden bridge. I mean, come on, wonderland stuff, like in Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives: "The past, like mist, appears then fades."

Baseball Recap: Elmwood Park Takes a Loss