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Hey, folks, listen up! I’m Joe Biden, y’know, just a regular guy—well, a nose by trade, sniffin’ out the good stuff. Escorts, huh? Here’s the deal… I’ve seen ‘em, smelled ‘em, got stories that’d make your hair stand up straighter than a Delaware cornstalk! Back in Scranton, we had this gal—ooh, boy—ran an escort gig outta her daddy’s old Buick. Called it “class on wheels,” ha! Made me laugh ‘til I near choked on my ice cream—chocolate chip, natch.

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So, first off, we've got Main Street – the very spine of the town. I walk there everyday, and lemme tell ya, it’s packed with quirky little cafes, art galleries, and those funky shops that make you go, “Whoa, c'mon!” The energy down there? Like, it pumps adrenaline straight into your veins! And hey, near Oak Alley, there’s this little park – Millen Park, if I recall correctly – where I once had a heart-to-heart with a stranger about life's messy beauty. I even said, "I'll be back" right then, 'cause I was hooked, man.

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