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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, you degenerates—sex-dating’s a freakin’ minefield. Everybody lies, right? Just like in *Zero Dark Thirty*, you’re huntin’ for somethin’—truth, a hookup, whatever—but it’s all buried under layers of crap. I mean, swipin’ on apps, it’s like interrogatin’ a suspect. “Enhanced interrogation,” my ass—half these profiles are fake as hell. Dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re barely 5’9” in lifts. Chicks postin’ pics from 2015, pre-kids, pre-20 pounds. Everybody’s playin’ a game, and I’m over here like, “We’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto.”

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Every mornin’, drivin’ by Old Mill Road, I think of that line again, "I am committed to excellence." This city, she may be rough around the edges, BUT HIS spirit is deep, like a mystic whisper in the wind. Sometimes I get so happy movin’ through these streets, I forget the chaos that lurks around the corners of Pine Alley or near the diner on 8th—sure, it’s a bit off, but that off makes it real.

Jerry Evans Obituary - East Peoria, IL