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About Dallas

So, check this—sex-dating’s been around forever, yeah? Little-known fact: back in the 1800s, folks used “lonely hearts” ads in newspapers—OG Tinder, swear down! Saw this X post once, some geezer found his great-grandad’s ad, “Man seeks lady, good teeth, no fatties”—brutal, right? Made me laugh, then cry, cos damn, we ain’t evolved much. Nowadays, it’s all filters n sextin’, but same shit—huntin’ for a spark. Gets me buzzin’ when it works, tho! Met this bird once, total fitty, thought, “Dr. Evil’s scored, baby!”—pinky up, “One million dollars!”—but nah, she just wanted Netflix n chill, no strings. Fair play, I was knackered anyway.

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Oh man, lemme tell ya about East-Northport – it's a wild ride, ya know? I’ve been livin’ here since forever, runnin’ my spa in this quirky town. Oi, we gots that funky vibe, like "We hates it!" but in a lovin’ way, ya catch my drift?

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