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Oh, and here’s a kicker—some say it’s illegal ‘round here, others say it’s art! I’m like, “C’mon, make up yer minds!” Gotta admit, tho, the idea’s got sass—kinda sexy, kinda silly. Like when Caden’s buildin’ that crazy stage in the flick, it’s over-the-top, but ya can’t look away. Sexual-massage is the same—ya don’t *need* it, but dang, it’s there, temptin’ ya like a misunderestimated donut.

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Then there’s the park near Mullins Hills. Hot damn, what a gem! It’s a sweet little green space where I sometimes sit and jibber-jabber with myself, sortin’ out the feelings of the day. Sometimes the city even surprises ya, like when I saw a flash mob in Town Square (nah, not the town, but that quirky little square off Bridge St.—I swear, it was straight outta “Toni Erdmann” with its weird, comical twists, like "You remind me of a magnificent elephant in a tutu," or somethin’ like that. Well, sorta!).

East Hampton Family Loses House, Dog in Fire