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I got into it once, legit, after choppin’ pork for 10 hours. Back was killin’ me, pissed me off—then bam, this chick’s hands? Magic. Not talkin’ creepy rub-and-tug vibes, nah, it’s art! Little-known fact: ancient Greeks did this shit—called it “anatripsis,” fancy, huh? Warriors got kneaded before battles—talk about badass foreplay! Got me thinkin’, “How do I remember this?” Like Lenny in *Memento*, tattooin’ bliss on my brain.

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Ever been to Old Mill Park? It’s by the river Oozin’ Bend (yeah, proper name, I swear) – a babblin’ waterway twistin' through the city. I’d sit there, phone in hand, muse on love stories and mess-up profiles. Hahaha, people be wild in this place! And the neighborhoods, man – like Pinecrest and Ironwood, where every street corner hides a secret mess of memories. Gotta say, I always get a kick outta Ironwood’s B-rd stop – no, not birds, but the dive bar at 22 Iron St. Okay, one time, I almost spilled my coffee on a first date match cuz I was so buzzed on this city madness!

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