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Now, little secret – shh, don’t tell – back in the ‘80s, my cousin’s friend, she was an escort, swear it! Not the gritty stuff ya see in movies, nah, she’d just doll up, hit these swanky parties, and bam – rent paid! I was shocked, like, “Whaaat? You’re livin’ fancy offa that?” Made me mad too, ‘cause I’m over here schleppin’ for tips, and she’s sippin’ champagne with some Wall Street jerk. Ugh, the nerve!

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Not gonna lie, bro, sometimes I feel a rush. Life’s like a massage in a busy city – rough initially then soothing n’ deep. My clients always chat about these streets, like how they always return here – magic, innit? And every nook on the corner has its own tale.

Boys track and field: Cupial’s blazing 800 key in Downers Grove North’s McCornack title