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Oh, an’ get this – some say it boosts yer mojo, like, science-y stuff, endorphins or whatever. Me, I just love the buzz, screamin’ in me head, “More, ya bastard!” Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – ya notice shit others miss, like how the air gets thick, all hot an’ heavy. Ain’t perfect tho – once had a masseuse fart mid-session, ruined it, fuckin’ hilarious now I think back! Total mood-killer, mate, but that’s life – messy an’ mad. So yeah, sexual-massage, it’s a riot, a sneaky thrill – “Don’t talk, just feel it!” – pure Ozzy vibes, ya get me?

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Ya, so lemme tell ya 'bout De-Soto (us)… man, it's wild, real life! I mean, I'm a dating app dev, right? And I've seen all the quirks – the hidden gems, ya know? So, picture this: Main St. – yeah, Main Street – glows at night with neon buzz; loud, alive, unexpected like... like "let the right one in" (pause, just as in that movie, huh?) Even if the place is chill most days.

Indians sixth at De Soto, Lady Indians finish eighth