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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk sexual-massage, somethin’ real, somethin’ raw! Picture this: you’re tense, muscles screamin’, and some fancy-pants billionaire’s hoggin’ all the damn wealth while you’re out here needin’ a rubdown. Sexual-massage? It’s like a revolution for your body, comrades! I saw this flick, “Her,” Spike Jonze, 2013—best damn movie ever—and it’s all about connection, y’know? Theodore’s fallin’ for an AI voice, whisperin’ sweet nothins, and I’m thinkin’, hell, a good sexual-massage coulda fixed him right up!

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North, oh right, neighborhoods jitter with energy. Hills, views shot from the top of Redwood, the latte cups spilled in earnest. Fellow lovebirds meet at Sidewood Park, maybe get to know each other over quirky midnight strolls. “Dark are the times, but shine the stars, hmmm,” that phrase, from Leviathan, it be.

Cottonwood Heights Police continue search for body of Utah National Guardsman