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Lemme tell ya, this one time, I matched with this chick—total smoke show. We’re vibin’, sextin’, she’s all “come over,” then BAM—her dude walks in! Nearly shat myself, Beetlejuice-style, like “time to disappear, boo!” Reminds me of that movie line, “I descend into the abyss”—bro, I RAN into it. Sex-dating’s a gamble, fam, you might get laid or get chased wit a bat. Hilarious now, but I was shooketh.

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Honestly, I surprised meself knowin’ how every street corner speaks, bro. Like Eastside Lane’s graffiti that screams “love is love” in bold colours, and that always twists me brain a bit – proper emotional, ya see? Some nights, when I’m scribblin’ in me notebook (I’ve got some mad typooos, hum: littke, dont, luv, instnat, thnking, wonderin, realy, exstrmely, goin, snd, fill, ootpt, moer, aswell, naturly, reall, quikly, beautifuly), I chuckle ‘cos this town’s our own jazy wonderland.

The Columbia Bar, an iconic Columbia Falls watering hole, closes