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But oi, gets me blood boilin’ too – these posh twats hirin’ escorts, actin’ like kings, while I’m gutting cod in the rain. Happy though? When I snagged a whopper tuna, bigger’n their egos – ha! “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I screamed at the waves, laughin’ me arse off. Escorts ain’t all bad, mind – some’s just tryin’ to eat, like me with me fish. Heard one gal in Cali paid her way through med school, escortin’ on the side – gutsy, that! Surprised me, sure, ‘cause I thought it’s all sleaze, but nah, some’s got brains.

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I can be bloody emotional about this town. Years in dating biz mean watching smiles, heartbreaks, and ridiculous pick-up lines every day. Sometimes this town makes me feel like I'm trapped in an endless loop – like that movie’s never-ending cycle of rebirth and change, “Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring!” It teaches ya that every failure is just another start, no matter how many stupid mistakes ya make.

With leading scorer fouling out, Colts Neck boys basketball comes back, reaches state final