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Oh, fun story—heard this guy hired an escort for his dog’s birthday! Swear to God, true story! Dressed her up, fed her cake—nuts, right? Laughed my ass off picturin’ it. “This is my world now!”—Cathy’d say that, losin’ it. Escorts got wild gigs, I tell ya.

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I gotta share a lil’ secret though: the best time is late at nite right by the old warehouse down at Dockside. Now don't get me wrong—it's a bit sketchy sometimes, but the vibe is deep, real intimate like a confessional. Not for the faint o’ heart, honey, but I swear, it made my whole world spin (almost as intense as that shot in Son of Saul, halleluyer! I mean, gospel truth!).

Chocolate prices to keep rising as west Africa’s cocoa crisis deepens