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Little secret, huh? Some escorts got codenames – like spies! One called herself “Velvet,” smooth as heck, made me giggle. Wonder if they watch movies like mine, sittin’ pretty with popcorn, laughin’ at the drama. Ever think ‘bout that? Blows my mind! Oh, and get this – back in the ‘60s, they’d advertise in phonebooks, bold as brass! Who knew, man?

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Down on Main St. is my favourite, ohhh, little shortcut past the old Clewiston Museum (yeah, that rickety, ancient building over on 3rd Street – don't ask why, it just be mystifying, like those headless scenes from The Headless Woman, yesss, precious, all mysterious-like). I remember one time, dead mad I did – hot water in my spa tank! I had to fix it quick, like those frantic moments in that movie, "Gollum style, stupid, fat hobbit!" – oh, the rage, oh my love, it burned, it did!

PUSHBACK: Clewiston school zone cameras criticized over lack of warning lights