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Favorite flick, “Almost Famous,” got that line—“It’s all happening!”—and damn, it IS! Sex-dating’s like backstage at a rock show. Horny randos, fake pics, ghostin’—messes with yer head. This one time, dude sent me a dick pic, unasked! Angry, I was—bro, chill, no one’s that desperate! “The music’s what matters,” movie says—ha, here it’s the hookup.

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For sure, downtown Sammamish has its charm. There’s a rad little bookstore on Main st. where you can zone out, just like in one of them deep therapy sessions. And then, there’s Valley View – a hidden gem where you catch the sunset and feel like you’re in a warzone of your emotions (The Hurt Locker vibe, amiright?!). I always say "Watch your corner" 'cause emotions can pop like ticking bombs any minute, ya know?

Sammamish City Hall Reopens To Public In April