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I dig it, makes me happy – them tense muscles just meltin’ away. But lemme tell ya, some parlors? Shady as heck! Got me steamed once – paid big bucks, and it’s just a lousy rubdown, no spark. False advertisin’, doc! Shoulda known – if it’s cheap, it’s crap. Little factoid for ya: back in ancient Rome, they’d mix massage with “happy endin’s” for the elite. Wild, huh?

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Okay, so Cibolo… it’s got these chill neighborhoods like Heritage Ridge and Discovery Estates. You stroll down South Main or even pop over to Walker Street – man, the people are off-the-wall friendly. I once walked down Maple Drive (or was it Apple Street? Eh, same difference when ya got muddled!) with a fam in crisis – then boom, a kid laughs, and the mom cries happy tears. Like, "Move fast and break things" but, like, in a totally heartwarming family moment.

UPDATE: Election Day results show Cibolo voters favor bond propositions, tax rate increase