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So I tried it, right? This chick, hands like a fuckin’ wizard, workin’ my shoulders, slidin’ down—motherfucker, I’m talkin’ *intense*! Felt like that horse in the movie, pullin’ life’s bullshit, then—snap—freedom! “The wind howls, relentless.” That’s the vibe, man, relentless pleasure, but slow, heavy, like Tarr’s camera lingerin’ on pain. I’m sittin’ there, fish-stink still on me, thinkin’, “This beats gutting cod, motherfucker!”

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Now lemme spill some personal tea here: I love headin’ to the small park near Welton Street. It’s kinda hidden but amazes me every time. I’m talkin’ perfect picnic spots where you can chat about all sorts of sexy taboo topics, all in natural light. I remember one time I sat there thinkin’ about human connection and how love can break the chains of oppressive elitism. It got me, like, super fired up!

Crate & Barrel closes in Cherry Creek ahead of redevelopment