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Exaggeration time—she’s got a tractor! Swear to God. Says she rides it naked. Probably bullshit. But I’m picturing it—hotter than a compost pile! Then—surprise! She’s quoting movies too. *“The past never lets go!”* I’m hooked. We meet. She’s no bot. Smells like dirt and cheap perfume. Sexy? Kinda. Angry part—she charges double! Greedy little—ugh! Still paid. Worth it? Maybe.

Two members of Devonshire Vice brief Chatsworth Neighborhood Watch on quality-of-life crimes.

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Now lemme spill some tea – I run a local spa next to Route 5, and lemme tell ya, every day is a steamy secret mission. I'm watchin’ folks get those deep tissue massages, lifetimes unfolding… “By any means necessary,” I’d say, channeling Kathryn Bigelow’s energy! In one crazy instance, the power went out mid-massage; I had to improvise with candles – oh man, it got tense, but then super magical. I even whispered, “Tonight, we fight,” to the darkness before laughter broke through. So raw, so life.

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