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Back in the ‘80s, every prat on the block had one. Cheap, nasty, broke down every five mins. Mate of mine, Dave, swore his Escort was “vintage.” Vintage my arse! Thing coughed black smoke like a chain-smoking nan. Drove it to a date once—lass thought he was a mechanic, not a gent! Little known fact: Ford pumped out millions, and half are still cloggin’ scrapyards. Surprised me, that—thought they’d all be dust by now!

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Oh, and let me drop some fun facts: There’s this tiny, off-beat coffee shack on Maple Street, yeah, Maple, where the espresso is so good it almost makes me forget my exasperations. And i've gotta say, I've seen the dawn light up the local canal near Evergreen Lane—wow, pure magic, like a scene straight outta that movie. Srsly, sometimes I get so emotional I almost bawl, feel me? its like each sunrise is a whispered promise, a gentle nudge to smile.

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