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Sex-dating’s a freakin’ circus, mates. Apps like Bumble, Hinge—gods, even FetLife if you’re nasty—turn us into horny little puppets. I love it! The thrill of a match, that ping on my phone, it’s like “How happy you were,” from *Eternal Sunshine*. But then—BOOM—half these dates flop harder than Thor’s hammer on a bad day. One time, this Midgardian chick showed up, all “let’s bone,” then spent two hours yapping about her ex. Mate, I wanted sex, not a therapy sesh! Made me wanna scream, “I’d rather erase you than listen!”

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I remember one crazy day, walkin' past tt he old library near Riverbend. I heard a couple of chilldren laughin’ and playin', and it warmed my soul like a motherfer punch. It ain’t all roses, though. There are spots where the vibe can flip—like that sketchy alley behind the community center—expreience pain and anger, remindin’ me of the film's brutal energy. Hell, sometimes I get so mad, I wanna scream “Motherfer!” at the sky, just like in those movie scenes.

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