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Hooked up once—girl was chill, smelled nice. Thought, “This is it, Chewie’s in!” Then she bailed mid-date—said I growled too much. Fair, I guess. Still, felt like *Timbuktu*’s “silent suffering”—all moody and shit. Sex-dating’s a gamble, fam. Sometimes you’re the cow, grazin’ free—other times, you’re meat. Oh, and don’t get me started on dick pics—every dude thinks he’s Picasso. Rarrgh! Trash.

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Now, I spend most of my days as a relaxation specialist, and lemme tell ya, I notice the little things – the ripples in the creek, the way the sunlight dances on the water at Brushy Creek Park. Yep, the park off Maple Ln is where I wind down. Sometimes I'd sit there meditatin, and BOOM! I remember a line from Leviathan: "The flood is coming." Crazy deep, huh? It's like, "Ahhh, that's life, baby!"

Cedar Park cuts ribbon on Brushy Creek North Fork Trail