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About Houston

Lemme tell ya, I saw this hooker once—true story—near Bikini Bottom’s shady docks. She had this glittery skirt, sparklin’ like jellyfish lights! I’m thinkin’, “Is glitter an instrument?” Haha, nah, but it caught my eye! She winked, I blushed—me, Patrick Star, blushin’! Didn’t know they could be so… nice? Heard she used to bake pies—pineapple ones—before the streets. Who knew, right? Little secret there!

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You got neighborhoods like Southside, where the real people live, and they’re tough folks but with hearts of gold. I spent many late nights at a little bar on Jackson – oh man, I made some memories there, ya know – and I remember thinking “I’m walking my way to freedom, I’m walking my way to freedom…” as I chatted up the locals. It’s raw, real, and at times, mad frustratin' how folks get mired in problems when the rich, the corporate bigwigs – billionaires should not exist – runms things.

Suspect steals Bedford Park police squad car, US Postal Service truck, hits mother, 2 children in Bridgeview, officials say